To give you a bit of background, I had decided to deliver in the US (Me and my husband live in the UK). The reason for that decision was honestly, my mom. As this being my first baby, and not having a support system in UK - I decided I wanted to be near my mom for this. She was a big help in teaching me and getting me through my ceserean and taking care of my baby girl.
I flew to the US in my third trimester and everything was good. Baby looked healthy, I was healthy and gaining like no other - honestly, I gained so much weight! Nearer to my delivery, they told me that my baby was getting big and that if I waited too long, I might have to get a c-section as she will be too big for my to deliver. Came my delivery date, and no baby. So I decided to schedule my induction. This is basically when they give you medicine to induce your contractions, so your labor can start.
I got to the hospital the night before at 10:00 pm, as usually inductions can take quite a while. They checked me in and gave my the medicine to start the induction. In a little bit, the pain started. It wasn't anything bad, but i could definitely feel it. They came to check on me every hour or so and to check if I was dilating. Honestly 6 hours in, and I hadn't dilated a bit. So they upped the dosage and then the pain really started. But my daughter just didn't want to get out! about 13 hours later, I had dilated 3 cm, and they broke my water. and continued giving me medicine. But then, I got a bit of a fever and my babies heart beat slowed down. They said it was because of the medicine and they stopped giving it to me. They started me on antibiotics and there I sat. With the pain increasing and being beyond uncomfortable. I had to wait for my babies heart beat to regulate back to normal before getting the epidural. It took 2 hours for them to be comfortable with her steady heartbeat - and then they gave me the epidural I had been asking for, which did help. In the next few hours I dilated to 10 cm and was ready to push. By this time, my sister drove in from Dallas, and my SIL was at the hospital.
I started pushing at 9:00 pm on July 2nd, with my mom on one side and my sister on the other. They held my hand and helped me push. I was pushing for a good 45 minutes with a nurse, when the doctor came to check in on me. She had me push with her for a few minutes and she then told me that due to my pelvic bone my baby was not able to come out and they would need to do a c-section. I was bummed. They whole reason I had the induction was because I didn't want to have a c-section. But what could I do - they cleaned me up and got me ready to go. My husband was unable to fly down for the delivery and was on the phone with my SIL - I was all over the place with my emotions. I really wanted him there at that moment, but we knew that this would happen if I had delivered in the US and had been okay with it. They wheeled me in the surgery room and my sister was allowed in with me. She held my hand through the procedure.
I had a cloth draped over, so I couldn't really see anything. I was staring straight up at the lights and praying. My sister was next to me, quietly. I was shaking a lot due to the medicine they had given me. The anaesthesiologist was the nicest guy, he was on my other side and had his hand over my arm, constantly telling me how great I was doing and that I was almost done. I asked him if this much quivering was okay, as it seemed a bit too much. My mouth was shuddering and I could barely speak. He told me it was normal and if I wanted, they could give me a medicine to calm it down. At first, I didn't want to take it - as I felt like it was too much medicine and something was wrong. But after a few minutes, I asked him to give it to me. My sister was freaking out beside me thinking something is wrong, as I was shaking so much.
Maybe 10 minutes later, I heard it - my baby crying. And the nurses and doctors saying, "oh my god, she's big", "you're a mom!", "she's lovely!". She and my sister went to the room next door to clean up. My sister was the first one to hold her. They brought her over to me as I was being stitched up, and I remember thinking, get her away from me. There was just so much going on at that moment. The feelings inside me, there were tears in my eyes. My sister held my hand once again and told me it'll be okay. They stitched me up and took my back to my room - where my family waited. They were passing around my daughter. The nurse asked if I wanted to hold her, and I said not now - I was still shaking and all I wanted in that moment was some Gatorade. I hadn't ate in over 30 hours, and I just wanted to drink some Gatorade - I wasn't allowed anything but water, but my dad sneaked me some. My husband was on facetime, wanting to speak to me, and I told him I would call him later. I did want to talk to him, but I was surrounded by so many people. After about 20 minutes, my shakes calmed down and I was ready to see and hold my daughter.
As I held her for the first time, I couldn't believe she was mine, and that I had carried her around for 9 months.
Sorry, this seemed to get a bit wordy - but I want to document all this for my future self!
Hoping to post more about my feelings and how they changed over time, picking her name, and the journey to healing after a c-section.
Thanks for reading!
I flew to the US in my third trimester and everything was good. Baby looked healthy, I was healthy and gaining like no other - honestly, I gained so much weight! Nearer to my delivery, they told me that my baby was getting big and that if I waited too long, I might have to get a c-section as she will be too big for my to deliver. Came my delivery date, and no baby. So I decided to schedule my induction. This is basically when they give you medicine to induce your contractions, so your labor can start.
I got to the hospital the night before at 10:00 pm, as usually inductions can take quite a while. They checked me in and gave my the medicine to start the induction. In a little bit, the pain started. It wasn't anything bad, but i could definitely feel it. They came to check on me every hour or so and to check if I was dilating. Honestly 6 hours in, and I hadn't dilated a bit. So they upped the dosage and then the pain really started. But my daughter just didn't want to get out! about 13 hours later, I had dilated 3 cm, and they broke my water. and continued giving me medicine. But then, I got a bit of a fever and my babies heart beat slowed down. They said it was because of the medicine and they stopped giving it to me. They started me on antibiotics and there I sat. With the pain increasing and being beyond uncomfortable. I had to wait for my babies heart beat to regulate back to normal before getting the epidural. It took 2 hours for them to be comfortable with her steady heartbeat - and then they gave me the epidural I had been asking for, which did help. In the next few hours I dilated to 10 cm and was ready to push. By this time, my sister drove in from Dallas, and my SIL was at the hospital.
I started pushing at 9:00 pm on July 2nd, with my mom on one side and my sister on the other. They held my hand and helped me push. I was pushing for a good 45 minutes with a nurse, when the doctor came to check in on me. She had me push with her for a few minutes and she then told me that due to my pelvic bone my baby was not able to come out and they would need to do a c-section. I was bummed. They whole reason I had the induction was because I didn't want to have a c-section. But what could I do - they cleaned me up and got me ready to go. My husband was unable to fly down for the delivery and was on the phone with my SIL - I was all over the place with my emotions. I really wanted him there at that moment, but we knew that this would happen if I had delivered in the US and had been okay with it. They wheeled me in the surgery room and my sister was allowed in with me. She held my hand through the procedure.
I had a cloth draped over, so I couldn't really see anything. I was staring straight up at the lights and praying. My sister was next to me, quietly. I was shaking a lot due to the medicine they had given me. The anaesthesiologist was the nicest guy, he was on my other side and had his hand over my arm, constantly telling me how great I was doing and that I was almost done. I asked him if this much quivering was okay, as it seemed a bit too much. My mouth was shuddering and I could barely speak. He told me it was normal and if I wanted, they could give me a medicine to calm it down. At first, I didn't want to take it - as I felt like it was too much medicine and something was wrong. But after a few minutes, I asked him to give it to me. My sister was freaking out beside me thinking something is wrong, as I was shaking so much.
Maybe 10 minutes later, I heard it - my baby crying. And the nurses and doctors saying, "oh my god, she's big", "you're a mom!", "she's lovely!". She and my sister went to the room next door to clean up. My sister was the first one to hold her. They brought her over to me as I was being stitched up, and I remember thinking, get her away from me. There was just so much going on at that moment. The feelings inside me, there were tears in my eyes. My sister held my hand once again and told me it'll be okay. They stitched me up and took my back to my room - where my family waited. They were passing around my daughter. The nurse asked if I wanted to hold her, and I said not now - I was still shaking and all I wanted in that moment was some Gatorade. I hadn't ate in over 30 hours, and I just wanted to drink some Gatorade - I wasn't allowed anything but water, but my dad sneaked me some. My husband was on facetime, wanting to speak to me, and I told him I would call him later. I did want to talk to him, but I was surrounded by so many people. After about 20 minutes, my shakes calmed down and I was ready to see and hold my daughter.
As I held her for the first time, I couldn't believe she was mine, and that I had carried her around for 9 months.
Sorry, this seemed to get a bit wordy - but I want to document all this for my future self!
Hoping to post more about my feelings and how they changed over time, picking her name, and the journey to healing after a c-section.
Thanks for reading!
